Chasing Dreams by Ollamok

Sonya had come to terms with the fact that Charles had autism. Autism encompasses a number of issues. These can be very different for each child. Charles, Sonya’s son had; ocular motor dysfunction, ADHD, Auditory Processing Disorder, sensory intergration issues, developmental delays, speech issues, Communication Disorder, Social Impairment, OCD and Anxiety. Sonya was sure they must be a couple of things she was missing in all of these labels. With all of the problems of fighting insurance and the state to get help to pay for things to see that Charles got the help she needed; the hardest part of all this could be the fight for chasing dreams. That is the dreams for Charles to have a near normal or the most normal life possible with the challenges he would face each day. In some ways Sonya and Chris, her husband, were blessed and lucky. They could afford some treatments that were not paid for by insurance or help had not come through from the state yet. Also, Charles had gotten into the school system at the age of three. This meant he had gotten early interventions. Some children had not been discovered until much later when interventions were much harder to do. Sonya was an avid researcher. She pursued information as though she was a starved computer for raw data or a homeless person that had not eaten in days. The preschool that Charles attended offered a program once a month to help teach parents how to work with their children. It was recommended to Sonya that Charles needed to increase his speech. So she could make flash cards of everyday things by cutting out things from newspapers and magazines. She did this and would say the word to Charles and he would repeat it if he wanted to play with a toy or watch tv. He had to do this every night or day for about three hours. It was hard work for him. If he did not say it Sonya would repeat the word until he did. The flashcard work continued for about 18months. Then he had caught up to the point he was making one and two words sentences. Then the flashcards were used for sentence making. The school said he was still behind in his speech. Sonya already knew that from a private screening that cost an arm and a leg. Paying for extra speech therapy at that hospital was out of the question. Eventually though Sonya found a speech therapy situation that was affordable. It was suggested that Sonya take him to an eye doctor that specialized in learning disabilities. Sonya did so just do add this to her list of things that needed attention and things to research. The findings were ocular motor dysfunction. The eye doctor at the time suggested occupational therapy. Sonya explained that she had chosen speech therapy at the moment because Charles was so delayed in this area. The doctor agreed this was a prudent decision if insurance would not pay for both. He did suggest that in 18 months he would start the occupational therapy if it were his child. Further conversation revealed that this doctor had three children on the autism spectrum. He had to deal with making these types of decisions for his children too. He knew that fighting the school system was hard. He asked what Charles was getting and he said I would have a hard time fighting for more than he was getting. This eye doctor became like a case manager for Charles’s needs. The doctor further stated that he would recommend vision therapy which he did at his clinic but that would be much later when Charles was in school and his eyes had improved a lot. The speech therapist gave Charles homework to do. This was in addition to what the school therapist had Sonya already doing. The occupational therapist at school had a few things for Sonya to do with Charles. The preschool teacher had her two cents worth. Sonya took all of this in and worked with Charles as much as she could. All of this was hard work. Charles worked hard every day. These kids put in plenty of hard days just to play catch up and achieve normal or the best they can do. The parents are worn down from working with them and maybe working a full day at work also. These kids need a team of early interventions. Charles was only getting a third of what he needed. The schools do best they can but can only offer half day preschool. Sonya felt blessed that the schools offered meetings once a month to show her what she could do to improve her work with Charles. In reality there should have been more time spent on teaching her how to work with Charles than this. Still this school did more than most, she learned when she compared notes with other parents. As you see, “chasing the dream” of the best life for Charles can take a lot of time. Looking for treatments can take its toll on the parents. Researching the internet and libraries takes time away from working with the children. The children have to work hard just to say a word. Many people dismiss how hard children like Charles work. Sonya’s own mother has told her how easy she has it. “I had it four times as hard as you Sonya.” Sonya replied to this with, “You have no idea how hard it is to be play mate, mother, therapist, reading specialist, and general expert on child behavior all the time with Charles. So mom please don’t comment on how easy I have it. Also, remember how we played with one another and as we got older did a lot of the housework. We did four times the work Charles will if he can. It is hard to do housework when I have to be Charles friend because he can’t make one!” Sonya is thrilled that Charles gets so much enjoyment out of swimming. He works so hard at everything else to see his eyes light up in the water where he can be a king is heaven to Sonya. This is a reward he will work hard for. Sonya almost hates making him do so. Why oh why must she? After the speech therapy Charles did 18 months of occupational therapy. Vision therapy was next. Then it was back to a rotation bases. Throw in a couple of tutors here and there and one has an idea of just what Charles went through up and til the eighth grade. Sonya had to go back to work so this meant she had to prepare Charles for being by himself. Sonya also had to start preparing Charles for being independent. Nothing has been easy for this child and nothing will be. Chasing dreams for Charles has been Sonya’s dream as well as a nightmare.